Sometimes life doesn’t whisper. It yanks the rug.
Other times it just taps you lightly on the shoulder, says, “Oh, by the way…” and then casually changes your entire trajectory.
I used to think I was good at anticipating plot twists. I am the type of person that believes in calculated risk, scenario planning. I overthink. I over-plan. I draft mental scripts for conversations that never happen. But real life? Real life has no respect for the outline.
A job I thought would last had so many things happening that I just had to leave. A person I thought would always be there violated my trust and I had to allow the friendship of years to atrophy. A version of myself I had worked hard to become outgrew me and well, it was taking me a while to adjust. A morning conversation with my Dad on wanting to document his life history didn’t happen because he died that evening. For all of this, the only thing that I knew for sure is that I didn’t see any of it coming.
I know I said I anticipate plot twists, but I don’t necessarily cope well with them. So, when these surprise events occur, I always question if I will make it. Thank God, I come out on the other side. Mostly intact. Sometimes even a little lighter. Definitely wiser.
That’s the strange thing about being surprised by life: the first reaction is often fear. Or grief. Or confusion. Or a big WTF to my ancestors. But sometimes, later, when the dust settles, there’s space to see what opened up. My brother always says to never waste a crisis and to gather data about everything including my reactions to how things unfold.
These observations have taught me that every time something ended, I felt it well, well. But it always gave way to something new. When someone left, I met someone new — even if that someone was a softer version of myself. When a plan fell apart, I finally had room to try something I wouldn’t have otherwise dared.
I’ve stopped expecting life to follow my drafts. I’ve started hearing the call to trust that I will be okay either way. These days, I’m trying to leave space for the unexpected and I don’t mean that in the Pinterest-quote way. I mean it like, really making room, for the unplanned and the spontaneous. I am even seeing how some of the best moments in my life have happened when I was standing in the debris of my best-laid plans.
So, if you’re like me and the last few years have felt like a prolonged season where everything feels off-script, I hope you know: That’s not failure. That’s movement. Sometimes the plot twist is the beginning of the good part – the best parts of you!